While a not-so-perfect skin could be a source of worry and depression for most people, worrying and eating up yourself will never be the solution. It’ll only worsen your skin as you’ll tend to have more wrinkles from frowning and sulking.
Controlling your thoughts, especially of self-evaluation, might seem a herculean task when you lack confidence. At times, you criticise yourself and feel timid around people when you can’t discover how to feel good in your own skin, instead of appreciating who you are. But why go through all that turmoil when you’re already perfect in your imperfections?
Though it can be difficult to feel confident with a skin that’s overrun by acne, cysts and other skin blemishes, there are ways to overcome those negative thoughts and accept your skin for what it is and yourself for who you are.
1. Stop seeking approval from others
Instead of measuring your value based on metrics from people’s opinions, discover self-worth inside you to become comfortable with yourself. In the words of Kristen Martinez, a counselor and psychotherapist, “being a perfectionist or a people-pleaser who lives for the approval of others can seriously hinder you from being comfortable with your skin and living in accordance with your wants and needs, instead of that of others.”
2. Make your own rules & Ignore the media
Yeah! You read that right! Stop being married to everything you see on the media, rather make your own rules! It’s your life after all.
You will find it difficult, if not impossible to accept and appreciate your skin when you bury yourself in magazines, movies, and every other online and offline content that emphasizes on the perfect skin. You’ll never accept your skin if you try to fit into that type of image because you’re beautiful the way you are.
The media and our culture impose a blueprint on us regarding how we “should” or “must” look, feel or act, to be socially acceptable. When you fall short of this, as most people do, feelings of self-consciousness, insecurity, and discomfort with yourself begin to creep in. Knowing that you don’t have to fit in to be acceptable or loved, makes the difference, as you stop trying to keep up with the Joneses.
3. Surround yourself with positive people
While no one is perfect, enveloping yourself with people who always put you down or are always negative will kill your self-esteem. According to Martinez, “If you surround yourself with friends who are always unhappy about their skin, especially if they exhibit body shame, negative body talk or eating disorder behaviors, it becomes difficult to accept your skin while listening to all their negative talk.”
4. Find a support group
In a similar fashion, surround yourself with those who love and appreciate you as you are and constantly remind you about the awesomeness of your characteristics and personality. “Find people who are in a similar situation or are dealing with similar issues as you are. Find support groups, or simply create yours! There’s great power in the realization that you’re not alone,” says Martinez.
5. Quit bothering about what people are thinking about you
Most times we bother about what people think of us when actually, they aren’t even thinking about us. Have you wondered why you don’t notice the flaws on other people’s skin but are quick to spot the tiniest pimple or freckle on your skin? Most times, our greatest enemy of self-worth is the giant mirror in our parlors and bathrooms. When we look at people, we tend to have a facial blur on their skin that we hardly notice their blemishes, unless we stare for a while, and when we actually notice, we don’t care. This is the same way other people see us too, and understanding this fact is a huge step towards finding satisfaction with your skin.
Placing too much priority on what people think about you, instead of what you feel about yourself will make you uncomfortable with who you are. When you start developing your self-worth and self-love, you will discover that it’s easier to let peoples’ opinions go. Don’t waste all your precious energy worrying about how others see you. Be yourself and you will attract the right people for the right reasons.